Friday, February 04, 2005

Star Wars III and The Life Aquatic

SW III: Let it not suck...Let it not suck...Let it not suck...(repeat ad infinitum)

The Life Aquatic:
This movie was really...uh...made. Bill Murry played this movie so low key that I felt like kicking him in the balls. Too much Prozac! Yet I still liked this movie and I am not really sure why. There were a few laughs, most of which were shown in the trailer. I found the movie slow and monotonous. I kept waiting for the plot to "happen". It did not. It ground on and on and on. Like a dental apointment that you thought was over until the dentist says "uh-oh" and you are stuck with another hour of drilling. It was like a blurry photo of a really beautiful image. I wanted the detail. I can't stand this movie. It is the demon seed of current cinema. It's like Mugwump fluid. It is like a tainted cheese that you eat, then vomit up, then go and eat it again. If I had to compare this movie to another movie I would say it is like Star Wars...being played on a 70mm projector...that is being dropped onto my head from the top of the Empire State building. No that isn't it eaither since 500 pounds of projection equipment, hitting me at 120 miles perhour, would be quick. Rather it is similar to the death of Beornulf of Merica as he was crushed to death in the streets of Norwich, stone by stone. Insanely I am giving this movie a 7.9 since I liked it though I have no idea why.

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