Bush Strategy

Bush: Well, my boy, I have some..uhum.. news for you.
Bush II: Yeah dad?
Bush: Yep.
Bush II: What is it dad?
Bush: You suck. I'm sorry, can't sugar coat it for you, you suck. Love to tell you the sun shines out your ass but, can't do it.
Bush II: But?
Bush: Is where the sun doesn't shine, thats right son.

Later that day...

Bush: My little boy here is cut from the same stock as his old man. A man that knows from where the sun shines and where it doesn't.
Bush II: Gosh dad you really can put the right spin on things. Someday will the sun shine out of my ass?
Bush: Don't interupt me boy I haven't fucked up this scentence yet.
Bush II: Don't forget to tout my military background.
Bush: While that limp wrist McCain was relaxing in a hotel in Hanoi, my sonny boy here, during those dark days of the Viet Nam conflict, served his country couragously by garding the strategically important Texas coast from surprise Viet Cong invasion. And hey...Did the commy's invade Texas? I think the facts speak for themselves.

Santa Claus: Speaking for the christmas community I can say that little Georgy was a good little brat..er..boy and got an average lot of presents from me. However any rumor as to money that was past from his father to the North Pole I cannot comment on at this time.

Black man: I tell you he tried to rub the black off my skin when I met him. He didn't seem to understand that, as a decendant from an African my skin has a dark cast to it. The guy sucks.